tinkeringconsciousness.eu

Tag: Atheist Mystic

  • States of Mind: Perceptual Shifts in Awareness

    This section describes perceptual shifts in awareness as they appeared in my own experience — not as doctrines or universal truths, but as changes in the way reality seemed to organize itself. The dissolution of bodily boundaries, the blending of masculine and feminine qualities, and the fading of dualities such as self and other, inside and outside — all pointed to a different mode of awareness. I can only describe what unfolded; interpretation remains provisional.

    Lightning in the Dark | Tantric Awakening, Death, and Dissolution

    A recollection of the first glimpses of perceptual shifts—moments like lightning in the dark, illuminating the path before I even knew there was one. These reflections, written in 2015, capture the raw astonishment of discovering how love, death, and dissolution intertwine.

    Energy Practice and Mystical Experience

    Mystical experiences arise naturally in energy practice. A sober reflection on why they do not justify grand metaphysical claims.

    Beyond the Narrative Self

    A reflective exploration of the narrative self, awareness, and the tension between scientific skepticism and contemplative experience.

    Tinkering with My BIOS: Basic Instructions for Survival

    A speculative exploration using the BIOS metaphor: how identity, space, and survival instincts may persist beyond thought and perception.

     Together, these reflections attempt to describe perceptual shifts in awareness without fixing them into conclusions, leaving meaning open to interpretation.

  • A Personal Timeline of Experiments

    A Personal Timeline of Experiments

    These three posts trace the timeline of a personal experiment — beginning with unexpected bodily sensations during intimacy and continuing through attempts to understand and work with them.
    Rather than instructions, they are records of what happened, how it was interpreted at the time, and how those interpretations changed.

    2009-2011: The Foundations – Tantric Union Without Knowing It

    A memory of wordless communion with a special woman — where joy, love, and energy revealed themselves as facets of a single current. What began as simple pleasure evolved into a meditation on unity, care, and the energetic depth of love. Years later, her memory became the seed of a visualization practice that still guides me.

    2011-2018: From Discovery to Androgyny

    The path continued: what began as a physical connection — amplified by cannabis and curiosity — became a journey into the energetic body. Through sensation, polarity reversed, and gender dissolved. The result was a deeper unity: not man and woman, but one current flowing through two forms.

    2018-Now: Fusion, Solitude, and Dissolution

    From the fusion of opposites in the body to solitary practice, this post traces the final stages of a long experiment. As perception and boundaries dissolve, the current reveals its true nature: not nourishment, but purification. What remains is the last duality — the witness and the witnessed — and the quiet hope that even this may one day vanish.

     These three chapters mark the unfolding of a single current — from the physical to the ineffable. Each stage, both ending and beginning, points back to the same question: what, after all, is awareness?